May 1, 2012
Young Adult | Dystopian
The Last Princess #1
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This review contains spoilers. Yeah. >___> Proceed with caution.
Happily ever after is a thing of the past.
A series of natural disasters has decimated the earth. Cut off from the rest of the world, England is a dark place. The sun rarely shines, food is scarce, and groups of criminals roam the woods, searching for prey. The people are growing restless.
When a ruthless revolutionary sets out to overthrow the crown, he makes the royal family his first target. Blood is shed in Buckingham Palace, and only sixteen-year old Princess Eliza manages to escape. Determined to kill the man who destroyed her family, Eliza joins the enemy forces in disguise. She has nothing left to live for but revenge, until she meets someone who helps her remember how to hope-and love-once more.
Now she must risk everything to ensure that she does not become . . .
The Last Princess.
I just want to let you know that when I realized I wasn’t going to enjoy The Last Princess by Galaxy Craze, I let the Snarky One free and well, she had a lot to say about this freaking awful book. But I DID attempt to enjoy it; the first sixty pages made me turn into a cranky old witch.
Right from the beginning it was horrible and not realistic—if you were royal, would you accept food from a stranger? Even if you WEREN’T royal, would you accept food from a stranger? No no no no. NO.
The entire novel feels like it wasn’t really thought out; I’m confused exactly how the Seventeen Days happened, and I’m really confused by how long it took Eliza to kill Cornelius Hollister. The timeline is crunched and stretched out that it’s like a limp piece of pasta. There was a chapter in the beginning where I didn’t know if it happened the NEXT day (which it seemed like it did, because she went to sleep at the end of the last chapter) or if it happened days/weeks after the last chapter.
The one thing I did *not* get was why does this Hollister person want to get rid of the royal family? Why did he keep Mary and Jaime free, when he could have, in fact, killed them and say Eliza was dead and claim the throne for himself? It’s like letting a thief into your house and you showing him where all the riches are. I don’t understand any of the characters motives—what are Portia’s and Wesley’s? I mean, I sort've understand Eliza's, but, um, she's not the last princess. She has siblings. That are still alive. O______o
AND DEAR GOD, I so called Wesley being the love interest! The Last Princess was one of those novels that would have been a lot better had their NOT be a romantic subplot; I mean, I get why, because of the ending, but holy crapoly, it was so not needed. And with Wesley? The guy who let her go? Ew.
Here’s the deal: you can kill off my favorite character ever (*cough*Serenity*cough*) and I’ll be okay with it, a few days later. But if you kill pets for absolutely no fucking reason I will be mad at you forever. It’s one of those things that pisses me off, because WHY would you want to hurt animals like that?? Especially for no fucking reason? Guys, I swear the animals deaths were to just add gore and make the evil characters more evil. THAT IS NOT HOW YOU DO THAT, GALAXY CRAZE. That is just not how to do it.
Oh, and that ending. The epilogue. Lawdy. Oh LAWDY. It’s the same thing as the prologue. Mary is crowned Queen and Polly goes to eat a strawberry—brought by a stranger—and Eliza is like NO! and splits open the strawberry to reveal the poison.
Lame. Oh so lame. And that is how an okay standalone book turned into having a sequel that I won’t be reading. I wish the characters were more fleshed out; I wish I felt grounded in the story instead of thrown all around (lack of transitions, yo. It messes with the reader); I wish the worldbuilding was solid. I just wish this dystopian had SOMETHING going for it to make it stand out aside from the whole fact that it happens across the pond.